Monday, April 30, 2007

The Behavior Of Them

There is community where we are gathering together. We called it adabuna, which plotted to be a group of writers from the middle east. We planned to make an anthology that was began from the end of year of 2005, and have hardly way to finished it. To make it simple, it was already ready to publish and getting sold, but what I still don't understand is why the some certain peoples have to delay it as they please and made me mad.

I can't forgive them for their stupid behavior, for not letting me publish it myself but keeping it unpublished for years! Why just don't tell me for their unwillingness and say sorry? I don't remember forcing anybody to something they dislike, so if they don't agree with my offer, why don't just let it go?

I thought maybe there was some circumstances that block their way, or maybe for some other problems, but to tell the truth, I had already offer them my own money so they can make this things settle from the very start. Can you think if someone came giving your his finished work, and it was ready to get printed, and you just delayed it as you please for years, and he asked very politely if he could help to make this thing finish early, and offer his money if that was the problem you had, how could you delay it for nothing? How can't you even think what he would feel toward this simple easy matter?

And how could he describe this other than a word of stupid? That is how I fell. And it made me very mad, and if I let my emotion spread this thing clearly in the public with the common language which is easily to be understand, even me will not willing to stand it if I were they. So I pretend not to be mad in front of them, and be as politeness as nothing happened, and try as hard as I can to forget it, (and to forgive it). But still, I fell uneasy to not tell this to anybody, and at least to myself.

From the bottom of my heart, I think this may comfort me a little after this sort of hell feeling I felt toward this thing. May Allah forgive me.

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